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A friend of mine sent me this letter, written by Moby (of "Porcelain" fame). Both men and women should read it.

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suppose you were redecorating your house. and you wanted your house to be a quintessential minimal mid-century modern
house. and you had a friend who only liked victorian houses, filled with velvet drapes and thick carpets and over-stuffed couches and lots of ornamentation. this same friend also had repeatedly said that they had no interest in ever living in a mid-century modern house. would you ask them for their opinion about decorating your mid-century house? obvious answer: no. because they don't like mid-century furniture and aesthetics and they only like victorian aesthetics. pretty simple, right? why consider the opinion of someone who has no interest in the aesthetic that you're going for? right? ok, that was the analogy.

so, i ask you, why do women listen to the aesthetic opinions of gay fashion designers don't get me wrong: i love gay fashion designers. i'm just dismayed that there are hundreds of millions of women currently starving themselves and beating themselves up because
they don't have a body that's deemed 'attractive' by men who aren't attracted to women. gay fashion designers(and editors, photographers, stylists, etc)are sexually attracted to men. which is great and should be applauded. but they're not sexually or physically attracted to women, which does kind of make their opinions about female bodies kind of moot. is it any wonder that these same designers/etc tend to like female models who have very boy-ish bodies?

to make an anthropomorphic generalization: male bodies: angular. female bodies: curvy. most female fashion models are angular, which is a quality normally associated with male bodies. women are supposed to be curvy. it's what makes a woman's body feminine.
can you imagine how absurd it would be if women designed clothes for men and expected men to have breasts and hips? wouldn't it be absurd if hundreds of millions of men were staring into mirrors and berating themselves for not looking more like women? ok, so isn't it then absurd that hundreds of millions of women are staring into mirrors and berating themselves for not looking more like young men? it's unnecessary and unhealthy.

and yes, obesity is bad. that goes without saying. but when perfectly healthy, normal women beat themselves up for being 'too fat' it's not only absurd, but emotionally and physically unhealthy. women are not supposed to look like emaciated 14 year old boys. they're just not. i'm not trying to pick a fight with the fashion industry, i'm just saying that endlessly promoting an ideal of beauty wherein women are supposed to look like emaciated 14 year old boys is absurd and destructive and creates tons of unnecessary anguish for the hundreds of millions of women who are healthy and don't look like emaciated 14 year old boys.

to use me as an example. i'm a vegan. i don't like meat. so if you were having a sausage and cheese party would you ask me for my opinion on what sort of sausage and cheese you should serve? of course not. my hope is that somehow women will allow themselves to be who they are, and stop beating themselves up for not looking like emaciated 14 year old boys. as i said, it's absurd and deeply unhealthy.
thanks,
moby
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"You work it....GIRL???"